An open letter

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An open letter to my grandmothers in heaven.

How are you My and Nay? Is heaven a good place for kind people? I think the answer is obvious. 

It's been awhile since I went home to visit you both. I miss you every single day and it's torture feeling lonely when I'm surrounded by people who also matters to me. Loneliness is complicated. Grieving is complicated. 

Things have been too serious lately. And sometimes, I just want to cry in your arms and sleep. I'll always run into you when things don't go my way. I want to hug you both when I can't take life as it is. Especially when it demands all of my being. 

I get too overwhelmed with people who pry into my life. I can't take it. I can't take their hypocrisy, their facades & masks. Why can't I live a peaceful life? Why is it that when happiness knocks on my door, chaos is always just two steps behind? 

Some people just don't have boundaries and some just don't have a life. And what happens to people who doesn't have a life to live? They pry on others; creating stories and twisting them to rumours. 

I plead guilty sometimes for meddling into the life of others but I don't spread them like wildfire. (Talk about how defensive I am in this case). 

And I do know that whatever I do, people will always talk. They will always have their opinion and so do I.  People just love projecting their frustrations at me until I got used to it. I enjoy pointing out their stupidity too-- the fallacy in their arguments, and the loopholes in their conversations (in which I wholeheartedly dread, of course). 

I just wish this turmoil inside me stops. I want to blame mercury for retrograding too much. 

Talk to you soon. 

With love,

E. 


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