I lack self-control

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Yes, that's right. I lack the discipline to sleep on time. I'm one of the guilty ones who scrolls on social media for hours, and over stimulates myself with ideas I know I probably wouldn't do right away. News that overwhelms me. Instagram stories of people who share their lives online, and so on. 

In fact, Merriam- Webster dictionary recognized the word, Doomscrolling in 2023. Which means, " the tendency to continue to surf or scroll through bad news, even though that news is saddening, disheartening, or depressing".  

I was one of the doom scrollers of 2020-2023. I indulge with overwhelming contents and suffer from anxiety the minute I put my phone down. It's such a shame that I'm still stuck on the loop --minus the sad news. This time, I doomscroll to read articles, watch booktube videos, scroll through my pictures, and look for references for my sketchbook. 

But even though I've cut out the negative contents from my algorithm, it still leaves me feeling too alert when I should be sleeping or when it's almost bedtime. 

This time I just have to do it. I have to make a change. A commitment to lessen my social media intake and presence, and BE PRESENT at the moment. I really hope I'll get through this online addiction by the end of the year. 

Don't worry, I'll still update my blog as much as I can. 

Wish me luck! 

To a better me with healthy eyes haha,

Elaine

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