To rebound relationships and beyond

I searched this on Urban Dictionary, it’s defined as the second best. For me, it’s like a band-aid. Used to cover up the wound from the past. The temporary fix and joy. ( Ka sad ba) 

I believe it is unfair to love someone in your former lover’s shadow. It’s an insult and offensive to the other party who just wants to love you. 

I remembered what my Mommyta said that hurt people hurt people. Everyone is projecting their traumas, including me. I’m not perfect but I am aware of what’s happening inside my head. 

I used to settle for being the second best because I thought I could make him love me. Here’s the surprising part, you can't. It’s not possible that someone who got their heart shattered can love someone else that fast. ( unless the love they have was shallow).

Talking from experience, it took me almost 2 years to get over and move on from my karmic relationship. I spent my time fooling around and looking for a partner. ( I was young and reckless.) But the minute I started to shift my focus to myself, only then love found me. It was another beautiful 2 years until it ended. 

Now I’m alone and kinda lonely but I am resisting the urge to fool around as I know I will end up empty. I know how it ends and I don’t recommend it. Jumping from one relationship to another is a big NO. You will hurt someone whose only intention is to love you and share their future with you. And you, being a piece of a jackass, decide to hurt them because you are hurt inside. And that my friend is not and will never be valid. 

This is a promise that I will make. I will not expose myself to a crowd, who only wants one thing from me. I don’t want a half-baked love and most importantly, I don’t want to live in someone else’s shadow. 

A piece of unsolicited advice from your overthinker friend, don’t settle for being the second best. Don’t be so thirsty for love and attention that you sip on every cup being handed to you. That’s how you get poisoned. That’s how you’ll lose yourself. Loving someone who's not yet over with their past is dangerous. 

I admit sometimes I get jealous of happy couples I see on the internet. I feel pressured. But I don't want to rush it unless the other person sees his future with me. Sit still and heal. Wait for God’s timing. Cliché as it may sound but I do believe that God has someone for everyone, me included.

All will be alright in time. 

-E.