Life doesn’t stop for anybody

I've been ruminating for days now. I’ve been consistently ticking off my to-do list for the week and I managed to survive the work and school week too. But sometimes, I would stop and think about my purpose… my life. Is this it? Am I happy? Am I doing well? Unfortunately, I don’t have the answers to my questions.

I made a habit of going to the park early in the morning to breathe and escape the matrix for awhile.I read books, I painted, and ate my snacks there. And for a moment, I felt this sense of belonging. The trees gave me a sense of “home” that day. 

And I thought about dying. In the middle of a peaceful morning, I was thinking about death and grief. I’ve always known that life doesn’t stop for me or for anybody. So even if I die today, the world will still spin and the people in it will continue their normal lives. 

I will be forgotten by my friends years from now. I will disappear like a bubble. It’s funny how we’re a speck of dust in the middle of a vast universe. Does this life even matter? Considering all the hardships we all go through I realized our problems aren't really that important in the grand scheme of things.

Why did I come to this conclusion? 

Everything will pass. Me, my feelings, my emotions, my problems, my happiness and sadness, my loved ones. Even the things that make me anxious at any time of the day.

So... I guess it’s up to me to figure out how to live my life then.

E.